The Complete Guide to Token Creation: From Launch to Exit
Preface:
So you want to launch a token? Congrats! You've taken the first step toward becoming a "blockchain entrepreneur"—which is either:
A) Revolutionizing finance, or
B) Preparing to rug pull (let's be real, it's probably B).
But hold on! Token launches aren't just about copy-pasting an ERC-20 contract. Here’s your step-by-step guide from "I have a genius idea" to "token price → zero"—explained in plain English.
Step 1: Pick a Chain – Which One Helps You Rug Best?
You need a blockchain "home" for your masterpiece. Top contenders:
- Ethereum (ETH): The OG. Gas fees will make you weep, but it’s perfect for "prestige" scams.
- Solana (SOL): Launch tokens like tweets—fast and cheap. Just know your coin might die before lunch.
- TON: Telegram’s golden child. Built-in traffic, but you might get flagged as a shitcoin.
- BSC: The rug-puller’s paradise. Low cost, but your project will instantly smell like a honeypot.
Pro Tip: If gas fees scare you, just announce your token on Twitter. (Spoiler: No one will care.)
Step 2: Token Contract – The Ctrl+C & Ctrl+V Masterpiece
Let’s face it—50% of token devs (and that’s being generous) just:
- Search GitHub for "free ERC-20 contract"
- Replace "ExampleToken" with "ScamCoin2024"
- Click "Deploy"
Common Disasters:
- Forgetting to adjust total supply, accidentally minting 1 quadrillion tokens.
- Not locking liquidity, so bots drain your pool in seconds.
- Leaving backdoors… only for hackers to rug you first.
Real Advice: If you can’t read code, just use CPBox’s token launch tool—it’s idiot-proof (and cheaper than a hack).
Step 3: Liquidity – No Pool, No Fools
A token without liquidity is like a dry swimming pool—people jump in and break their necks.
Classic Moves:
- Add 10 ETH to create a tiny LP pool.
- Shill "Community-driven liquidity!" on Twitter.
- Pull the pool once suckers ape in.
Honest Suggestion: If you can’t afford liquidity, just mint an NFT instead. (Way cheaper to rug.)
Step 4: Marketing – How to Attract Willing Bagholders
Even the best scams need hype. Low-budget strategies:
- Twitter/X: Spam "LFG!" and tag random KOLs (who’ll ignore you).
- Telegram: Fill a group with bots screaming "MOON SOON!"
- Discord: Run a fake airdrop (400/500 wallets are yours).
Premium Scam Tactics:
- Pay a KOL with 3 real followers to shill your coin.
- Photoshop "whale buy" screenshots (just remove the watermark).
- Fake a "partnership" (aka your alt accounts liking each other’s tweets).
Step 5: Post-Launch – The Art of the Rug (or the Slow Fade)
The real skill lies in what happens after launch:
- If price pumps? Write a manifesto: "True value recognized!"
- If price dumps? Blame "market FUD" and promise "big news soon."
- If no one buys? Wash trade with your own wallets.
Golden Rules of Rugging:
✅ Don’t get greedy – Exit before the mob does.
✅ Don’t get cocky – SEC letters aren’t trophies.
✅ Don’t get stupid – Leave a plausible deniability trail.
Final Words
See? Launching a token isn’t hard. The real challenge? Cashing out before $0.
So go forth, future "blockchain innovator"! Remember:
"Launch early = visionary. Launch late = copycat. Don’t launch = loser."
—Some Crypto Guru (Probably)
May your token:
📈 Pump at launch
💰 Let you exit
🕳️ Rug gracefully (jk… unless?)
(Disclaimer: This is satire. Don’t actually rug. Or do. We’re not your mom.)
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